Joe is a good friend of Danny Bonaduce.  Danny hosts a morning radio show in LA and every now and then Joe gives him a call on the air.   It was Danny's birthday recently so Joe gave him a call which went like this .....

Danny:

    All right. Apparently the Bonaduce Extravaganza continues.

Jamie:

    Yes, and on the phone we have your special friend and...a *superstar*.

Danny:

    It's two different people?

Jamie:

    Well, the first guy is Joe Lando.

Danny:

    Oh, Joe Lando! Hey Joe!

Joe: (singing -- crooning very badly)

    Happy Birthday to you. Happy Birthday  to you. Happy Birthday dear Danny ---
    (the dog starts barking). Happy Birthday to you!

Jamie:

    Okay, your dog hates you.

Joe:

    Queue the dog!

Danny:

    The dog hates you singing Lando!

Joe:

    No. I...I taught the dog to sing Happy Birthday specially for today!

Jamie and Danny:

    Ohhh.

Jaime:

    Very nice.

Danny:

    Thank you. For those of you who are unenlighted as to Joe Lando, Joe
    Lando is from "Dr. Quinn, Medicine Woman" where he played the real handsome
    like half-Indian dude. And then also...

Joe:

    That was me?

Danny:

    Yeah, and then with the really long hair and all the chicks went
    "woooohhh". And more recently of course from the Fox Family Channel, "Higher
    Ground." And also he played "Jake" on a soap opera. There.

Jaime:

    Wow!

Joe:

    And I played a drunk at your parties.

Jamie:

    All right.

Danny: (laughs)

    Hey how are you by the way? Are you still injured?

Joe:

    Uh, I just stopped peeing martinis yesterday.

Jamie:

    What happened?

Joe:

    Uh...we drank a little, had a little fun over at the compound and uh...

Jamie:

    He calls it the compound too?

Danny: (laughing)

    We all call it, it's the compound!

Joe:

    Yeah.

Jamie:

    Oh, my god.

Joe:

    It was! It was fun. It was the best of times.

Danny:

    So, you know, we have not all gotten together in years! And there was
    a little alcohol involved. And then all sorts of high school memories start
    coming up. The next I know, everybody's brawling!

Joe:

    I was like Brill Cream. A little of me could go a long way that day.

(Danny laughs.)

Jamie:

    He was there for the fight?

Danny:

    He was more...he was...he WAS the fight!

Joe:

    I was SO beat up.

Jamie:

    Why were you fighting, Joe?

Joe:

    Ohhh, I don't know. I don't know.

Danny:

    It's what boys do.

Jamie:

    Come on. Would the Medicine Woman like that?

Joe: (laughs.)

    Yeah! Actually...

Danny:

    So uh, how's Kirsten?

Joe:

    ...that's where I learned. What?

Danny:

    How's Kirsten?

Joe:

    She's wonderful. She would be here to wish you a Happy Birthday, except
    Jack just woke up. So she's taking care of him.

Danny:

    Jack is their *lovely* son.

Jamie:

    Right. I assumed that.

Joe:

    Hey, were you surprised?

Danny:

    Yes, I was!

Joe:

    Yeah, Jamie! Uh Jamie...I'm making coffee and I heard her saying, "Joe!!"
    on the radio...

Jamie:

    I know!

Joe:

    And I tried calling in but...

Jamie:

    Actually it's "Jooooeeee!!" (like a howling dog) (Joe laughs) But
    Debbie Gibson called out of line, that bitch.

Joe:

    Debbie Gibson called?

Danny:

    Yeah, yeah.

Joe:

    Aw, I missed it.

Jamie:

    And you know who else called is that guy from "The Courtship of
    Eddie's Father."

Joe:

    Brandon Cruise?

Danny:

    See!? He knows Brandon Cruise!

Joe:

    You got the retro thing this weekend.

Jamie:

    Yeah. You just wait till you hear the next people coming up. Woo buddy!
    Danny: Ah, come on! Make it stop!

Jamie:

    You know what. We tried to get that dead girl, but she was dead.

Joe:

    Ooh.

Jamie:

    What's her name?

Danny:

    Dana Plato.

Jamie:

    Right.

Joe:

    Ooh.

Danny:

    You're just rude.

Joe:

    Hey, did Zac call?

Danny:

    Yeah. They're all calling in this morning.

Joe:

    All right.

Danny:

    So, Lando what is your next big TV thing we're gonna see from you?

Joe:

    Gee, that's a good question.

Danny:

    Uh oh.

Jamie:

    Uh oh.

Danny:

    The next thing you know he's gonna be a disk jockey.

Joe:

    I'm doing some dinner theater in Pomona. (Danny cracks up) And then uh,
    well, it's -- I just gotta get back into it, man.

Jamie:

    Yeah, right.

Danny:

    Gotta polish my craft and tune my instrument.

Jamie:

    You really need to apply yourself, Joe.

Joe:

    It's not so much about the money now, man. It's just about making people
    laugh. (Jamie and Danny crack up.)

Danny:

    Well it's working so far, Lando!

Joe:

    Well, anyway, you have a good one, Danny. And you're a great guy, a
    wonderful talent, and I hope you have many, many, many, many, many, many more.

Danny:

    Is this some freakin' awards dinner?

Jamie:

    Yeah?

Danny:

    Thanks, Lando. I'll talk to you later.

Joe:

    All right. Talk you to later.

Danny:

    See you, buddy.

Joe:

    Bye!

Danny:

    I am so happy about this. Lando's actually, he's been up in Vancouver
    doing this uh...TV show. He's like one of my best buds.